“When you know for yourselves, ‘These things are wholesome; these things are blameless; these things are praised by the wise; these things, if undertaken and practiced, lead to welfare and happiness,’ then you should engage in them.”
~ The Buddha (Anguttara Nikaya 3:65)

I have wrestled often with the idea that the want for enlightenment, or at least practicing for that purpose, is a form of desire (Tanha). And of course, the Buddha taught us that desire is one of the roots of suffering (Dukkha).
Well I have a new view of that today, and it is called aspiration. This word, aspiration, means desired goal. And even better yet, another version of this same word is aspirating; which means to breathe!
Well geez, I can do that. Just breathe, right?

So I think I have a relieved sense of purpose now. I don’t cling or attach to this idea, nor do I have a desire to become enlightened. I simply aspire to it. If it happens it happens, if it doesn’t it doesn’t.
I will be mindful of this and diligent in my practice. And as the Buddha inferred in the Pali Canon quoted above, I will question and investigate. It is my duty to know for myself, and see the truth. This, to me, leads to the ultimate truth. This comes from wisdom, and with practice I gain wisdom little by little.
Yes, sometimes I feel that I am falling backward. But with patience and gentleness, I pick myself up and push forward on this path.
You see, I know what the summit looks like. I have seen it in human beings that are alive today. My aspiration is not based on faith or illusion, but a truth that I have examined and witnessed myself personally. These are all bits of wisdom that I am so very grateful for.

So I hope this gives each of you a new perspective on your practice, as I know it has for me.

May you be well, happy and peaceful